Now, I'm sure that most of you who have followed me have noticed that my DA account is long gone. Well, after some serious thought and self reflection, I decided to shut it down. I know it's a bit of a disappointment, but for me it's the best decision I've ever made.
I joined DA back when I was 12. During those early years, I didn't exactly make a good impression. I didn't have a scanner of my own, so I posted someone else's work and said it was my own. I constantly argued with people who didn't agree with me on certain subjects, pestered people into drawing things for me, and to add insult to injury, got mad at people who would call me out whenever I did something stupid. Needless, to say I was going nowhere fast.
Then, when I finally got a scanner and started posting my "real" work, I got so much of a swollen head from all the comments and faves that I thought I didn't need to improve. Of course, I was dead wrong. But, even when my artwork was improving, my social skills and my health were still at square one. I became to obsessed with trying to get more "street cred" on the site that I let my life pass me by.
This became even more of a problem considering that this was going on during high school. The only way I thought I could make friends in real life is by asking any body with a sketchbook if they had a DA account.
It didn't take me until late last year to realize that I've wasted my time on something that would grant me no beneficial joy in anyway shape or form. While, I admit that it did give me an opportunity to meet a lot of naturally talented artists, it didn't really assure that I would meet any of them personally (unless, it was at a convention) or that they would want to be affiliated with me in anyway. I tried to take a break from it, but I kept getting lured back with false hopes that people would actually listen to me as a person.
All said and done, I still feel that closing my account was a wise decision. It gives me a chance to catch up with my life and from the looks of it, it's going to be long way to go.
While I respect your decision, I wish your experience on DevART didn't leave a negative one. The Internet is a place where you have to take even nice things people say with a grain of salt. It's just how it is. Hopefully, this feeling of insignificance and pain will lift from you because even though I don't KNOW YOU-know you, I don't want you to feel sad. :,( Best of luck out there. I, from the Internet world, wish you good luck, and Godspeed.
ReplyDeleteAlso, I see my name under your "More people who kick my ass" section of links. You draw/color/ animate WAY better than I ever could! And your realism is wonderful. If anything sweetie, you kick MY ass! XD
See ya around, Malcolm!
Sometimes physical changes like that need to be done in order to conclude stuff in your head.
ReplyDeleteSay, if you associated a place with bad memories, its not a great idea psychologically to keep going back to that place because it just stirs up the same old memories. In that respect, I agree that you made the right decision. You were never going to enjoy being at DA so long as those memories kept prodding at you.
I'm not so great with keeping up with blogs, but I will try my best to visit more often. =)
@Christina
ReplyDeleteDon't be so modest. You're inking and story writing skills surpass mine any day of the week.
@Gemma I'm glad you understand where I'm coming from and please keep in touch. :D I actually have a few ideas that need your "touch".